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[rock music] ♪ ♪ [the non-commissioned officers' "ahead of the wave" playing] [upbeat pop music] - ♪ life is a rolling ocean ♪ ♪ if you want to stay in motion ♪ ♪ you gotta get, you gotta get ♪ ♪ you gotta get ahead of the wave ♪ ♪ young love's never humble ♪
♪ everybody takes a tumble ♪ ♪ better get, you better get ♪ ♪ you better get your head on straight ♪ ♪ hear that rolling ocean ♪ ♪ better get ahead ♪ ♪ you know that wave is comin' ♪ ♪ if you want to catch the big fish ♪ ♪ and take him to cherish ♪ ♪ you got to get ahead of the wave ♪
♪ you better get ahead ♪ ♪ you know that wave is coming ♪ - 324! - 325, 326, 327... 328... 32--32--329.yeah. - watching you guysplay badminton makes me profoundly sad. - we weren'tplaying badminton, glen.
we were playing goodminton. the point is to hit itas soft as possible to get as many in a rowas we can. - it's a game ofgentlemanly cooperation. - i'll bet you two learneda lot about gentlemanly cooperationin your bed, where you have sex. - no one likesa homophobe, glen. - and no one likesyou two assholes.
- you kiss your motherwith that filthy mouth? - you kiss your boyfriendwith those ugly lips? - as a matter of fact... in your fricking face. - whoa, you can't talkto the kid like that. - that's not a kid.that's glen. he's a dick. - screw you.- okay! - hey, hey, hey, hey.
- come on. - "street fighter", baby.- glen, go--go home. - you're lucky.you're lucky. - hey, come on. we're gonna be latefor our double date. - suckers. [light guitar music] - to be clear, no, he doesn't really kiss me with those ugly lips,
because we're into girls-- specifically these two extremely attractive girls that are meeting us right now. this seaside pub is rustic yet hip, this is my favorite shirt, and i'm having a pretty decent hair day. yup, it's a good day for capital-l love. ford over here is more interested in, well, the kind of love you don't have to call again.
now, despite all odds, we are crushing this first date. i could imagine juststaying in on a saturday night and watchingdry british comedies and, you know, streaming, and it's like i kind offantasize about, like, cuddling you, you know? ooh, that sounded way better in my head. maybe they didn't hear me. ah, i just blew it for us.
- oh, my gosh.i should go. this is gonna be too awkwardfor me to handle. - yeah, i'm gonna comewith you, actually. - what?- what? - you're not gonna leavea tip or at least payfor your drink? - great.[sighs] - you know what, noah? i don't even thinkshe was the one.
- yeah, mine neither. definitely not the one. - why both our names? it should just be your name. you're the painter. - yeah, but it was our idea. - yeah, but you'reactually talented. you shouldn't even beworking here. you know what? you could bea millionaire painter,
like--like picasso or even banksy. - yeah, i'll getright on that. - the guys need to see this. - [sighs] [clears throat] - it's a great painting. i mean, for a fistingbro spray. - last week, i was paintinga top hat on a condom,
and now this. maybe i ought to just,like, you know, quit my job,be, like, a real artist. - i don't know. do you like food and shelter? - i do.i love those things. i literally need themevery day. all the time.- really? - ooh.
fascinating. a scathing satireof the homoerotic world of faux masculinityand fraternal life, an american cover-uphoisted upon young men to capably deny their desirefor the fist. how's the website looking,programmer? - poundthefistfeelthemist.comis up and running. - pound the fist,feel the mist. the bro community'sgonna love that.
- i agree. derrick, matthias,do we have a theme for our promo party? - oh, we're gonna needsome more time. we had some ideas, but they werea little bit... raunchy? - oh, wow. i'm gonna go ahead and say
that even a little raunchyis not okay. - well, it's a giant, veiny fistcalled tight. i love it. - remember our motto: "we give the customerswhat they want." - that's not reallya motto. it's kind of justwhat businesses do. - okay, let's just getthis model made of noah and ford's designand test it. - yes, sir.- you got it.
- let's go.hmm? come on. oh, just us?all right. we'll work on that. - [whispers]i'm already done with my work. [energetic rock music] every day after work, we like to meet up for happy hour. the happiest thing about this place is that girl. ford likes to call her ngh for never gonna happen,
because, well, after a year, i have yet to figure out how to make a move. even jess has more game than me. - when was the last timeyou had a one-night stand? - yesterday. [laughs] i had to have some. so i opened my phoneand swiped right. - mm.- we met for coffee.
i took him back to my place, introduced him to the roommates, got the go-ahead, so i brought him backinto my room and closed the door. all: and? - adult stuff happened. that's all i'm gonna say. - ooh!- what?
- and then i asked himto leave, because i like eating dinneralone. - that's how it's done. - can we stop talkingabout me? derrick, let's talk about you. - last night. - no.- wait, what? what about your boyfriend?- oh, he knows. but we live bywhat's called gay law.
- what is that? - we're listening. - so carlos and ilove each other, but we're dudes, and we do what dudes do,and-- - so technically, you guyscan have a threesome whenever you want. like, you can literallysee a guy at a bar and say, "that guy"and go home and bang.
- and we do.- that's it. i want to be gay. it's so progressive. - i don't thinkthat's how it works. - it works for him.perfect, bam. - so nobody gets hurt? - okay, getting hurtis not out of the question, but for us, it's not likeyou straight weirdos. - you must learnto press past your fears.
when you do, life willunfold before you in the most beautifulof ways. i once mercy-bangedan elderly scottish woman. saved my life. - okay, that's a storyi want to hear about. - yeah.- pictures. - i'm just not, like, a "hit on a girlat a bar" kind of guy. - we know; it's 'cause you'rea "get in a relationship
"and then get broken up withand then cry about it to your friends"kind of guy. - that is so harsh. - bye, baby.- [laughs] - how could you do that? - you just lost your chance. i should have talkedto her. noah, you have to takesome swings. otherwise, it's alwaysgonna be like prom.
noah was standing in a cornerin a bad-fitting suit looking all desperateand sad and pathetic. - my suit fit very well. - that's it. what is more sexualfor the american adolescents than the senior prom? we will createa prom night for this tight. hmm? [upbeat music]
- sir. have you tried tightby bro spray? it's free. [people talking and laughing] - so excited. - you guys havinga good time tonight? - are you texting a hot guy? - no, i'm actuallymaking an app. it's like--okay, you takea picture of your face,
and then you scroll this barfarther and farther, and you get older and olderuntil you're dead. and then you can scrollbackwards till you're a fetus. - wow, that's...amazing. - it's only workingto middle age right now, but you'll be deadbefore you know it. - oh. - on the app,not in real life. i think you're great alive.
- that's great. - people are waiting. you need to get out thereand test the waters, see how the tight wateris floating. don't be the kittyafraid of the titty. go milk.ha! - he likes to punch me. both: oh! - it's bro spray.really?
- oh, that's awful. - [coughing]- it smells like-- it smells like--- good stuff. - no, like, fruit stripe gum mixed with, like, hot tar. - it's what we're selling. - get out thereand holler at the honeys or whatever it isyou frat boys do. make it look likethis stuff works.
- ford out. - could i take you upon that killing offer? - i thought you'd never ask. i know it was awkward before,but yes, sure, definitely. let's do that. but have a little fun first. good luck. - yeah. - what is that great smell?
[sniffs]oh, it's me. here, smell, smell. oh, you look like a girlthat wants to smell me. come here, girl. - hello, miss. i am wearing a sexual fragrance, and i--yeah. - it comes in a little fist.how cute is that? pound it.
- this is the essence of bro. it's eau de bro. it--is that gross? you're right; i wouldn'twant that on my body either. [music playing] - beautiful, beautiful work,boys. tight is gonna flip a biscuitwhen they hear about this. thank you. - great.
- how was your reactionto the smell? - oh, it was great. it was just, you know,pure animal attraction. just women just coming at me,and i had to, you know, get them away. - when was the last time you ejaculatedinside of a woman? - excuse me? - [chuckles]no, no.
noah hereis a serial monogamist. he's only had sexwith himself. - or a girl.- in his dreams. - i swear to godi've had sex. - it's okay. i know what it isto be celibate. - i-- [laughs]that's the thing, though. i'm not celibate. - shh, shh.- i'm really not.
- [clicking tongue] i have a long and very turbulentsexual history, to the point where, honestly, doing the sticky-stuckushas grown quite passã© for me. i prefer the intensityof a good dream. - oh.- especially a sticky one. i've trained my mindto control them. the ecstasy of a lucidmidnight emission, ooh, incomparable.
i will partner with youand show you how. - oh, i'm-- - take me up on it. - i think i'm okay. - i will show you.- okay. - i think he has the hotsfor you. - i don't know about that. - listen, me and jess are aboutto go out for some drinks. you want to come?
- uh, no.you guys go have fun. i thinki'm gonna just stay here and wallowin my self-loathing. - all right, good. get some practice in,all right? - thank you. love you.bye. - oh, dude,you smell horrible. - we all smell horrible.that's tight.
go.have a good night. - oh, he's not wrong. - well, the promo party's an epic disaster, on top of which i've designed the world's worst-smelling body spray, and it's just my luck, while destroying my monstrosity, that's when i met callie. - damn, what did those bottlesever do to you? could the concept be douchier?
- uh...[chuckles] - kind of hard to believe that someoneactually made this. - yeah, well, someone did. - and that someone is you? - that someone is me. - [laughs] do you mind if i takea picture of you? - uh...- with this?
- i--um... okay. - take your glasses off. you're handsome.embrace it. - [chuckles]- you should wear contacts. ready? sadder. sadder.[shutter clicks] perfect.
well, i hope to seemore of your work someday. - yeah? hey, i'm noah. - i'm callie. - callie. could i get your... email or something? - no, i have a better idea. [upbeat dance music]
♪ ♪ - wow. - secret party. [squeals] - what? - i like this one of you. - i have a visible erection. - really?- no. - oh, then i'm not interested.
- i like you. - why? - you keep it low-key. you're like an iceberg. there's stuffbelow the surface. - i'm pretty sureit's just ice beneath the surfaceof an iceberg. [bell ringing] - praise hands, everybody.come on.
come on.feel the spirit. [sighs]or not. but let's all be thankful today, because the client boughtour prom campaign for tight. - yeah.- all right. - now, due to my faith, tight isn't a producti personally endorse, as it encourages sexbefore marriage, as well asits subtle endorsement
that sodomy is a-okay. but we're still youngas a business, need to take it all. uh, i did not mean thatsexually. - well, i take everythingsexually. all the time. - okay, well,now for some great news. we just heard from converse, and they want to doa promotional event
here in town,and they want us to pitch. - what's the strategy? - urban adventure. so i want everyoneto put your heads together and just come up with somethingoutside the box. i really think we canblow converse away. [various conversations] - uh, how abouta city-wide scavenger hunt with clues that lead peopleall over the city?
there'd be, like, a goalat the end or a treasure, like a one-of-a-kind pairof golden converse. i could do the art, have ford talk to manufacturing, jess builds the app,derrick shoots the spot, and matthias writes the copy. - noah, i am blown away. this idea just might beyour ark. as in noah's ark?
- yeah, we saw it. - with russell crowe. - you--no, you gotto read the story. in--in the book. - we don't see itwith the russell crowe, but he's in it. - okay.you know what? good job, noah, okay? - all right!- dude!
i have never seen you so on. - i know, right? okay, can i tell youa secret? - of course. - i kind of met a girl. like, a real good-looking lady. - does--does she know you? - yeah, yeah, dude.she knows me. we--we kissed.
- what?that's awesome. we can go on a double date now. - yeah.wait, hold on. you're seeing someone too? - i don't want to jinx it, but tomorrow afternoon,i have a date, and i'm completely into her. - yes!i love it. dude, that's awesome.
okay.see, man? shit's really turned aroundfor us. - bloo, bloo, bloo! you know what? i really like this place. i mean, this is so muchdifferent than my normal first dates that i really appreciate this,so thank you. - you're welcome.
- i'd normally invite you over, you know, pour some wine,make some popcorn. you know, sit on the couch,start cuddling, put on some netflix, and then you know,start--start chilling. - is this on your first date? - i mean, usually, 'cause there usually isn'ta second, so... - oh, okay.
- no, to be 100% honest, i'm really gladyou took me here. i don't normally getto see things like this. - really?- yeah. - you're not just saying that? - no, the girl never usually takes me on a date like this. look at this.look at this. i mean, trees smell nice.
i'm just messing.i'm happy to be here with you. it's cute.- here it is. [bird squawking] - we're gonna do it here? - ni hao ma.- [squawks] ni hao ma. - that's awesome!it said, "ni hao ma." what does that mean? - oh, i don't know.i don't speak chinese. i just mimic birdswho speak chinese.
- ni hao ma.- okay. [bell ringing] - guys, the miracles keep on coming. converse likesnoah's treasure hunt. they want to hear more. so in the next couple weeks, we're gonna do a formal pitch. - i'd like to do the pitch.with ford. - okay, you guys got it.
oh, uh, and in other piecesof news, as of last night, marta and iare officially engaged. [whistles and applause] so i think a little celebrationis in order, so everyone pleasejoin us for cake. it's marta, not martha. - they're both good names. this is like barf-a.
- you must be so psychedto get married. - it's a blessed union. - yeah, but i mean more sofor the, you know, getting to have sexfor the first time thing. and then hopefullya lot more times after that. - oh, well, i won't lie; i'm a hot-blooded male too. but as you know, i havea strong religious center. otherwise,i'm just like you.
- well, let me recommendsome slow jams, you know, so you canbump and grind and ah, ah, ah. - tell me about this new girl. - well, it's only beena few dates so far. i don't want to, you know,say too much. - you've literally said nothing. - oh, well, i thinkthat may be for the best. i--i get so nervoustalking about her.
i mean, and my handsget sweaty. feel them.- i believe you. - yeah.i don't know. she's really cool. she's, like, creative--like, very creative-- but in, like,a really nonpretentious way. - yeah, of course.she's very hot. and she's actuallypretty smart. - and she's dating you?
- i know.right? - i'm, like, totally smitten, but i got to be carefulabout it, because i think she is maybeseeing another guy. - well, we haven't discussed the whole exclusivity thingat this point. - she said she's opento just dating one person. - don't have that conversation. - no?- no.
exclusivity. - so i don't know. i mean, i don't--i don't wantto sound too confident, but i think there's, like,a 50/50 chance that guy could be me. - 50/50, yeah. not to worry.that wasn't too confident. i think you're good. - yo.
so i heard youtelling derrick this girl of yourslikes whiskey? mine too. - what else about yours? - uh, well, she ispretty bad-ass. - oh, trust me, mine isthe definition of bad-ass. and she knows howto make me laugh. she's so funny. - ooh, mine too.
but get this.mine rides horses. - okay, mine rides horses. but she doesn't know howto ride a bike. - mine had a tiny chihuahuawhen she was little named j.lo. - j.lo. yeah, um, mine did too. - mine's 5 feet... - 7 inches tall? - takes...both: boxing classes.
- eats...both: chili lime chips. - wears...both: adorable red sneakers. what is happening to us? - noah? look, this is gonna hurt, but one of ushas to stop seeing her. - dude, come on. you know a girl like thisis not coming along in either of our livesever again.
- maybe. but she came intoboth of our lives at the same time. - all right, you know what?let's be fair. both of ushave to stop seeing her. - [scoffs] - it's the only waywe'll survive this, noah. - [sighs]i-- okay, fine, sure.
i'll do it first. - what's up? - i can't believei'm doing this. um, i have to-- [phone buzzes] i don't really knowhow to say this. - i'm sorry.- okay. - great.- what? - my friend bailed on me.
we were supposed to gomushroom hunting, and now she can't make it. - excuse me. what?mushroom hunting? - i mean, we go huntingfor mushrooms, and we eat them. - [sighs]you're amazing. - noah.- hmm? - would you want to go with me? - i--i do love mushrooms.
- it's pretty cool. - well, i mean, i can--there's a-- please, yes.i would love to. - here you go, sir. - callie? [sighs] i'm breaking up with you. me and noah just--you know, we can't-- we can't keep--
oh, my. i'm screwed. - okay, so what happened? you didn't break it off. - i didn't break it off. noah, it was hard. - i know!it's impossible! she's sexyand loves mushroom hunting. ugh, it's like someoneinvented the perfect girl
just to torture us. - you didn't break it off. - no, of coursei didn't break it off! i'm mortal! - okay. all right, look. what if i saidi had an idea? now, it's gonna soundcompletely crazy, but just-- - nope, i'm not flippinga coin for her.
- no! can we both agreethat if we stop dating her, some inferior jerkwho doesn't deserve her is gonna swoop inand start dating her anyway? - yes. - you know what happens then,noah? - uh...- we both lose. - right. - but what if...
we don't stop dating her? - i'm sorry.i'm not following. - we share her. - what?- we joint-date her. it'll all be aboveboard. - let's back up. i think that is literally-- and i mean thiswithout exaggeration-- the worst ideai've ever heard.
and we work in advertising. - is it, though?- yeah. - but is it?- yes! i mean, she's gonna end upliking one of us more, probably you, and this-- oh, man, this whole thingis way too weird. - it's not that weird. - it's that weird. - people date morethan one person all the time.
the difference isthey're not honest about it. we're best friends;we'll be so honest. - yeah, i'll just tell her,"honestly, callie, "ford and i are best friends, which is why we are gonnadouble-team you." - yeah!- what? - that's actuallythe perfect situation. what do guys complain about mostin a relationship? not enough space.
what do girls complain about? not enough attention. this way, we'll getdouble the space. she'll get double the beef. she might be into it. she's not like other girls. she's from venezuela. - that doesn't mean anything! everything about thisis absurd.
- the point is,i don't want to lose her. - yeah, i don't wantto lose her. shit! - venezuela. - yeah, i heard youthe first time. okay.okay, look. [sighs]ah! i'll do thisbut on one condition. - i stop usingyour work computer for porn.
- that would be a good idea, but also if she dumpsone of us, then the other personhas to break it off. it's all or nothing. - you won't regret this. - yeah, i won't regret this. of coursei'm gonna regret this. you know, we're gonna--dude, don't dance like that. you know we're gonnafreak her out.
nothing about this is good. god, i hate him. - noah, just be cool. - no, i'm being cool. look, dude,we got to get out of here. she's gonna come any minute. i can't--- she's coming. - hey! - hey.- [laughs]
- hey. - have a seat.- oh. - funny story. we actually found outabout each other. - really? - we're actually best friends. - that's weird. - well, it's aboutto get weirder. - we have a proposal.
noah and i havea lot of fun with you. and you have a lot of funwith us, right? - yeah.- we all have fun. so why should thathave to stop? - i'm not following. - all right, callie, look. noah and i individuallyare not that amazing. - wait, no.guys, you are amazing. - trust me on this one.we're not.
but together--oh, together, we become, like,this perfect boyfriend. - like a boyfriend voltron. it's a show from the '80s. it's--never mind. - callie, noah isn't about to jump out of planeswith you, but i am. but you knowwhat he is gonna do? he's gonna read books with you.
he's gonna talk about art.you know, art? and he's gonna... he's--he's gonna... [both talking quietly] - but look,what we're saying is, date both of us. but, like, at different times. - we want to beyour boyfriend. - wow, um...
here's the thing, guys. i want you to knowthat i like you both a lot. and at this point, i would hateto choose between you both. - then don't choose.you don't have to. - yeah, but this three-way thingis kind of crazy. - you're right.it's crazy. we-- - no, no.but that's why i love it. - what?- see? - yeah, i love it.
i mean, it's different from any other relationshipi've ever been in, and they've all been super bad, so it can't be that bad, right? - no.it's not bad at all. it's actually great.- yeah. - but aren't you guys gonnastart, like, i don't know, fighting or anything? - no, no, we're best friends.- yeah.
- we've been throughso much worse. - we're good.we've been through worse. - all right.let's do this! - what if everything feelsdifferent now with her? - it's not gonna be different. you've gone on a coupleof dates with her. they went great, right? - yeah, but nowit's, like, official. we're both, like, officiallydating the same girl,
which is just gonna be awkward. - it's not gonna be awkward. just keeping doingwhat you're doing, and all will be fine. - all right, look.here. - what's this? - my lucky flask. well, one ofmy lucky flasks. just put some bourbon in it,
and no matter where you areor what you're doing, if you have that,you'll be okay. - these sound likefamous last words. - hey, assholes,i'll take a drink. - that's cute. [light music] - my dad and my mom-- i don't know;they separated, and he's been gonefor a while.
you know, me and my fatherused to come here all the time to go fishing. i was actuallya really good fisher. - yeah?- yeah. he's like my best friend. and i'm talking too much. - no, no, no,no at all. - yes, i am!- no, i-- look, i enjoy listeningto you.
- all right. whoa!- this is stupid. but i love it.i love it. - let me show youwhat i got. - wait, wait. - oh! - oh, my god! - that was close.- wow. - have you always loved
taking pictures? - yeah, i mean,if you think about it, it's the only thingthat freezes time. - okay, maybe one day,you'll be like, you know, a famous photographer. - i mean, i would love to belike annie leibovitz. you know who she is? - an--annie leibovitz!yeah! she's my favorite!
- she's my favorite too. - noah, everything you knowabout annie leibovitz in, like, three seconds.- the photographer. - yeah, but give me more,because callie brought her up in a conversation,and i didn't know what to say. i felt like an idiot. - she took that famous portrait of john lennon and yoko ono when they're lying in the bed naked.
- okay, perfect, perfect.that's more than enough. hey.- hey. - you know what? while you were gone,i was thinking. you know what i want to dowith you? we should re-create that famous john lennonand yoko ono picture that annie leibovitz took. it's, like, my favoritepicture of all time.
- well, you know what? i don't like that onethat much. what others do you like? - ye--um...i--i like the... okay, i don't know anythingabout annie leibovitz. i just found out that fact 'cause i kind of wantedto impress you. - well, you did. - well, it sounds likeeverything is running
like a german auto factory. as they say, hitchless. - it's going great,and the best part is there's no pressure. it's just pure fun. - well, i'm very happy for you. and you too, noah. - huh? - you work well together.
you two are ninjasin the same dojo. just make sureyour swords don't cross. - you told matthias? - no, i--i didn't. - then who did? - okay, yeah, i did,but it's fine. he can give usbeneficial advice. he does weird stuffall the time. did you know he wasa live-in sex butler
for a man and womanin stuttgart? - so? dude,as soon as ed finds out, he's gonna freakand he's gonna fire us. - he's not gonna fire us.we've been killing it for him. - yes, he will.dude, he's so christian, he still watches"veggie tales" movies. he doesn't have kids. - matthias knows betterthan to tell anyone. we know all hisdeepest, darkest secrets.
- well, well, well.i'm impressed. i always thought of you boysas typical straight dudes, but it turns out you're moreadventurous than i thought. keep up the good work. - you always need to getrelationship advice from your gay friend. - so we should have the talk. - 'kay.what talk? - the sex talk.
- [laughs]what talk? - the sex tal--i'm asking, have you had sexwith callie yet or not? you haven't told me, so-- - no, no, no! - okay, cool.okay. - i've been taking it slow. - yeah, cool. - have you?
- uh, no. - oral? - uh, uh, just kissingso far. all right, we can't be weirdabout this. - yeah, no, i know. - no, like, this isour make-or-break. one of us is gonnaget there first, and the other cannotfreak out about it. - no freaking out.got it.
but...[inhales] but, like, which one of usgets to go there first? you know what i mean? - that's not our decisionto make. - oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.no, i know that. but i just wonder, like,we could both agree to-- - or we both agreeto just be cool about it. [phones vibrating] i'll hang out.
you got to goto the gym, right? - not after this little talk. - okay, you know what? let's flip a coin for it. - no way. - then what do you suggest? - well, tonight's gonna be our first double date, i guess. - which is weird.
i mean, on top ofthe already weird situation. - now that i told youabout your arrangement, are you, like, disgustedwith me and ford? - oh, no, not additionallydisgusted. just the same as before. - but, like, in a good way. - no. you realize when one of youhas sex with her, things are going to implode,right?
- [scoffs]oh, come on. i mean, we have our own, like,styles and vibes and stuff. we're good. - none of those things,like, help the situation. but whatever you say.you do you. just call me right after. not right after.maybe the next day. whenever you feel comfortableand are fully clothed, give me a buzz.
thanks for listening. i figure ford's, you know, just proclaiming itto the office, so, you know, i thoughtit might be a good idea to get a female opinion. - yup, that's me. all female, all opinions. [snaps fingers] - welcome to the mill.
all right, right there.come here. i want to show you, like,my favorite thing in the world. this is big buck hunter. i have the high scoreright here, as you can see. my hunting personais one shot. - you?- one shot, baby. - come on, callie.me versus you. - look, the objective is to actually killthe animal,
so no playing nice, okay? you know how to use this? - i got it.yes, i got it. - this is how you--- i know how to hold a gun. - all right, reload.- down. - [laughs]it goes down. ready? all right, i'm gonnatake it easy on you. - no, don't take it easyon me. - ready?
go. [gunshot effects] - i got that one. - [laughing]- oh! - how are you--- is this working? - yo, just be quiet.quiet. nothing from the peanut gallery.what are you doing? how are you doing good at this? stop, you're not supposed toactually be good at this.
- i'm actuallyreally good at this. - careful.stop. - [laughs]whoa. - what?- i got one. - holy shit.- oh, wait, no, two! - my gun's broken. - i'm about to beatyour high score. - no, my gun's not working.no, you're not. - oh!oh!
- holy shit. you got the critter bonusand everything. - bummer, dude.sorry. hey, you,you're a wonderful artist. i love your work, beating ford at his own game. - i was just warming up. - it was gonna be embarrassingfor him. - you are, like,made of magic.
you--you're magical. god, i just--i love you. - i--i said i...love you? - i love you too. i mean--i mean,we love you. - yeah, that's what i--i mean, we-- we love you. - i love you guys too. this is actuallypretty nice.
- yeah, it's working out. - oh, it was a long night.i'm gonna go home. ford, you're on the way. do you want meto drop you off? - uh, yeah.sure. - i'll see you tomorrow? - this has a lot of potentialright here. - yeah?- this is quite good. it titillateswithout being too insipid.
it's really--- oh, hey, here we go. so all right.check it out. here are the converse. - these are fresh! - funky fresh.- we'll focus-test it. so how's your collective girldoing? - i still can't believe that ford told you guysabout that. - i trust them.
- noah, your secretis safe with us. okay? i have much darkerand dirtier secrets i've never, never revealed. much darker. - i'm curiousabout the sex schedule. are the three of you exclusiveto one another? have you even floatedthe threesome question yet? i would.
- no, we've beentaking it pretty slow, you know, so no sex yet. - [coughs] [laughs]actually... - whoa, whoa, whoa,whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. you're--last night? when she was justdriving you home? - look, it had to beone of us. - ford to reception, please.
- i'm sorry. [bell rings]- round one goes to ford. [laughs nervously] um, okay, guys,i need your help. - you want to stick itin your girl. - sure, okay. yes, yes, that iswhat i want to do, the thing you said. - noah, i love you,
but you're too sweetfor your own good. you need to add some dangerto the dynamic. women love danger.- they do. - yeah, but, see, i'm not reallythe dangerous type. you know what i mean?that's kind of, like-- i wouldn't know how to do that. - i'm not telling youto stab anyone. i'm telling youto invite her over and put ona sexy liam neeson thriller.
- stabbing could be funif it's with your flesh rod. if you ask me, what i see here is you and ford,and over here is callie. and who's this? this is noah up on his sexual steed, this erotic little animal. and he's running throughthe pastures. to get to the callie,you're gonna have to gallop.
and then you're gonna haveto whisk her away. whisk her away through the-- [thud] over there in your bed. that's whenyou will transform yourself into the sexual noah. when you do,i want to meet him. - me too. - they told me to be, like,sexual noah.
- sexual noah?what does that even mean? - wait, well, you shouldn't belistening to these guys. i mean, they don't even knowwhat they're talking about. sexual noah? that--that sounds gross. - i just envisioned it. i don't know.it just seems weird. be yourself.she'll be comfortable.
she'll pick up on it. and you guys will havea really good time. - yeah, see,but i don't even know what to, like, do with her. - she's not an infant.take her on a date. - yeah, we've been on dates. i'm saying, like,i don't know-- like, what's an ideal date? what's, like, a perfect date?
- i think an ideal date is just taking a nice walk. - a walk? - i mean, yeah, show up with,like, a cute little gift or strawberry ice cream. that'd be awesome. - okay, but, see, no, 'cause she doesn't evenlike ice cream. - what?- no, it's a thing.
- that's weird.you realize that, right? - i know,but she's one in a million. what are you gonna do? - just be yourself and stop tryingto be someone you're not. you want her to like youfor you, don't you? - yeah, okay.no, you're right. that's--yeah, that's probablypretty good advice. - it was?
i mean, honestly,the whole time, i was blacked outand just thinking about food, and i really don't thinki hit the surface of the analogy. - oh.- i should stop while i'm ahead. you like it?we're good. can we eat now? - i'm good.thank you. - bye.
- cute kitchen, noah. so we're watchinga liam neeson movie, right? - uh, yeah. or... - you know, all moviesshould be filmed in newspaper offices. - i know. right?it's amazing. - when he walks with a lady, he waits for her. - oh, well, in that case...
- [laughing] oh, i wish i worked there. wow, that was actuallyreally good. hey, i got something for you. - okay, it's... a little something,uh... - what is it? - oh, my god, noah. did you make this for me?
- yeah, it's my first memory of seeing youat that prom thing. - i love it. - yeah, you like it? cool. [whistling softly] - dude, what's going on? - hmm?what? [babbling]
- did--did you and callie... - i slept with her! - [laughs]i knew it! - it was likea religious experience. - i'm happy for you. - i think this thing'sgonna work out. - it is. - did she ask you,by the way, to do that photo shoot thing?
- yeah, yeah. - yeah, do you knowwhat we're doing? - no, i just said i'll do it. - yeah, okay, me neither. nice ones.okay. - yeah, looks good. - hey, they're here. hey, guys, this is emery. he's an amazing photographer.
he's helping me a lot. - how's it going, emery?ford. both: nice to meet you.- yeah. - nice to meet you too. so cool you guysare up for this. - yeah.- oh, of course. anything forthis beautiful lady here. - so what are we doing,exactly? - you guys are gonna bemy models.
- [laughs]- okay. - we're gonna model?- yeah. "naked friends."- cool. - yeah.oh. - old friends, young friends,unfiltered. oh, really?- yeah. - in a photo, in--- yeah, what's the big deal? - there's the wholeposterity thing. what about my future kids?
i don't know. i don't want to see them-- i'm sorry.who are you, again? - i'm emery.- emery. - it's called "naked friends." i need you both. - look, i would loveto support you in this. i want to support you.i just-- i'm not cool with that.
- well, i don't knowwhat to do now. the project's due. - look, it's cool. i'll do it, all right?- what? - i feel likewe're friends already. - no, no, no, no, i need you. i need you to help me shoot. - look, you knowwhat you're doing. come here.good, you're good.
you got this, all right? - all right.- okay? - yeah.- all right, let's do this. - let's do it.let's get naked. [laughs] new friendsgetting naked together. - crazy kids. - ♪ i want to get wild with you ♪ - ♪ i want to get wild with you ♪ - perfect.no, no, no, back to back.
- ♪ wild with you ♪ ♪ i want to get wild with you ♪ ♪ i want to get wild with you ♪ - nice meeting you. - [speaking indistinctly] - hey.uh, congratulations. by the way, the whole thing,i'm sorry about, you know, not getting naked. - no, it's okay.
you're you,and ford is ford. and he gets into thingsreally hard and really fast. you're more of a slow burn. but i know i can count on you. - yeah.but, hey, we're still on for movie nightat my place tonight? a 1933 ernst lubitsch filmcalled "design for living." it's about two best friends. i thinkyou'd find it interesting.
it's kind of up your alley. - i have a better idea. come into the green room. - i--oh, wow. - here, take a shot. - uh, okay. hey, man. what's going on? - callie had an idea.
- oh, did she? what do you--what do you--what's going on? - well, ford is basically naked, and i'm about to be naked. - oh, are you? - is-- mm. oh, uh, 'kay.is-- yeah, hey,i'm not kissing you.
- i didn't want you to. - so? - [stammering] - we gonna do this? - i guess. oh, screw it.it's been a weird day. - [no audible dialogue] - ah.whoa! - well, look what you did!
- i got it. - i kind of feel a little weirdabout last night. - hey, yeah. it was a little intense. - it wasn't--it wasn't quitewhat i was expecting, you know? - yeah, a lot morewaiting around than i was expecting. - waiting, yeah. it was just waitingand then watching
and just got a little weird. - yeah.- yeah, that's what it was. - i mean, i'm gladwe did it, though. - yeah, i mean,i always wanted to have a threesome...i think. i mean, not reallywith another guy, but it was--it was different. it was--yeah. probably one-time thing,though.
- you weren't into it? no, i mean, i was just-- i just wasn't expecting youto be so--you know. - good? - yeah, yeah, like, it was--you were very good. she was really into itwith you, and i was feeling...not so much. - that's bs.you looked great naked. like...very, very straight.
it was nice. - oh, that's as faras we have to go on that front, but thank you. i appreciate it. - hey, it's been long enough. what do you sayshe meets our friends? - you thinkthat's a good idea? - totally. i mean,we're having a company mixer. why doesn't she come along?
- dude, she can't come along.ed's gonna be there. ed can't find outwe're dating the same girl. - okay, then she comesas one of our dates. - whose? - normally, we playgoodminton. today we don't play goodminton. we play to win. we play badminton, and the winner getsto take callie to our dinner.
- you're on, rico suave. - idiots. - oh, there he isright there. - oh.- yo, yo. - uh-oh, there he is.- how's it going? - ford, thank you so muchfor coming, man. - thank you for having us. i want you to meet somebody veryspecial: my girlfriend, callie.
- hi.- oh, pleasure to meet you. ford, good worknabbing this beautiful woman. - oh, i know. she keeps me young. so where the drinks at? - oh, drinks are in the back.- perfect. - go at it.all right, man. take care. - ambien? - oh, no, thanks.
isn't it, like,2:00 in the afternoon? - sleep medication promotesespecially vivid dreams. and as you know, i cancontrol myself in those dreams, mentally stimulating myselfto the point of orgasm, really. - yeah, right.of course. - it's like pablo picasso said: "anything that you can imagineis real." so anything i imagine sexually,it will happen, no matter how sensual,how deviant,
or how fantastic it might be. - excellent. - yesterday i was banging-- - nope. so how are things going? - so i'm almost doneworking on my app. - yeah?let me see. [laughs]oh, my. so this is what i'll look likewhen i'm dead?
- i thinkit's a fair approximation. - oh, my gosh, that's great. jess, you're gonna sella bunch of those. - thanks. i mean, the interfacestill needs so much work, which is actually why i thought maybe i could send yousome stuff and you can come upwith some ideas, if you have a chance.
- sure, yeah. can you believethat's our girlfriend? - it's actually pretty weirdwhen you say it like that. - what?no. come on.don't be so negative. things are going great. i mean, we say"we love you" to her. - and how does she take that? - great. she says,"i love you guys" back to us.
- like, "i love you eachindividually" or "i love you guys plural"? - uh, i think it's-- i think she says,"i love you guys." i don't know.i don't remember. why? - well, one is somethingyou say to your boyfriend, and the other is somethingyou say to, like, your bros in a beer commercialor something. - okay.[laughs]
i think she meant it. [stammering] we're gonna keep saying it,okay? whatever. - look, i didn't want to bethe one to say this, but you realize this shit'sgetting really weird, right? - what? since whenhave you thought that? - i've always thought that. - but you supported me.
you were the one who hadall the good date ideas and, you know, the ideasfor things to do and what's gonna makethis thing work. - i just--i guessi didn't think you would take it this far. i thought you'd realizepretty quickly that this is a bad arrangement. - it's not a bad arrangement. it's real.
- if this is real, if you have real feelingsfor someone, i just--i don't understandhow you can be okay with them not beingcompletely into you too. - wha--[laughs] look, i'm happy, okay? - you don't look very happystanding up here, pretending not to beher boyfriend. - i am.i'm--
okay, look, yeah, okay? i do. i want--i want her to like me the way she likes ford. - okay, great.go down there. go get her.win her back. i don't know what you want meto say anymore, noah. - look, i mean, i'm try--i'm trying. they're always doingsomething dumb and fun together, and i don't knowhow to compete with that.
- okay, be dumber and funner. - yeah, that--that's probably-- that's actuallywhat i should do. - no, i was being sarcastic. - no, i mean, that's the only movei have left. the me thing,that's not working. what i need to dois be not me, be something other than me,be better than me.
you're great. if you don't realize that, you're even dumberthan i thought. - this is perfect. thanks for coming. - hey.- noah, what are you doing here? - let's go on a trip right now,you and me. - what about ford? - no, he can't make it.just you and me.
he's busy.got work stuff, you know. busy guy.he does things. - okay, all right. where are we going? [birds chirping] i just love alligators. - there are no alligatorsin minnesota. - no--minnesota? venezuela, not minnesota.
- venezuela.i see. okay, well, hang on.you wait here. i'm gonna go surveyfor alligators, and i'll be right back. - wait, i should--- no, just you wait here. i'm gonna make sureit's safe. i will call you in a second.- all right. - hey.now. - yeah?- come here.
this is gorgeous.here, come on over. i'll show youwhen you get here. callie, callie. come here. come here.come on up. ta-da! - oh, my god!are you crazy? - let's do it right here. - no!- come on. i am crazy.- shh.
- i am out of my mind! - oh, my god.- come on! - you have no clothes on! - come on.- no. - come on.- no, no, no, stop. - callie.- we can't do it here. - callie, come on.- no, no, stop. - come on.[whistling blowing] no, no, no, no.
there's no--it's not-- no, she's--she's my-- - you stay away from me, okay?i have mace. - please, now, stop.[whistling blowing] there's no need to whi--there's no-- i can--i can explain.there's-- i can explain. [siren blips] i need you to bail me out.
- i don't have any money. - oh, you know what?we can call ford. - no, no, no, we can't. he's--he's busy. - emery.- um... - do you have a problemwith emery? - did you and emery ever... - why does that matter? - i don't know,because he's, you know,
super handsome and amazing and a super-cool guy who's richand has amazing pubes. - pubes?- yeah. what?i looked at his pubes, okay? okay, you know what?forget about it. let's just call ford. yeah, you're right. he's probably notthat busy. - noah, did you make that up,that he's busy?
- no, no, i--he's-- i'm just sayinghe's probably not, you know, as busy as, like,another busy person who's often busy might be. - noah, are you still okaywith us all dating? i'm super cool. - doesn't seem like it. [melancholy music] - i'm cool.
- i can't believe you liedto her about me. - i'm sorry.i needed alone time. - we had alone time. we had schedules. we're partners, remember? - right, great partners. - she hasn't even answeredmy last couple of calls. she's holding you against me. - she liked us, noah.
it was working. what more did you need? - i-- - oh, and whenis the last time me and you hung out--just us, messing around? we don't even do thatwithout her around anymore. look, ed's wedding's tomorrow, and if she doesn't show up,i don't have a date. and that'll be your fault.
you know, i think the reasonwe're having problems with this whole callie situation is because you're jealousof me. - why would i be jealousof you? - maybe because me and callieget along great together. you know, we have fun.i'm able to make her laugh. she needs excitement, not somebody who canbarely even trust her. - no, what she needs is someonewho can keep
a relationship goinglonger than two weeks and who can talk to herabout things other than big buck hunter. - i talk to her way morethan just big buck-- - hey, guys. - oh, uh, hi. you look--wow. - i wasn't sureif you were coming. - i wasn't sure either.
- well, you look beautiful. - i said that. - talk to me, noah. - you said you liked livingwith that guy and girl in stuttgart, right? - so did anyone everhave problems? like, did anyone ever getjealous or anything like that? - it actually endedin an interesting fashion. inga shot marcusin the knee
with a heckler & koch9-millimeter. it was a fricking bloodbath. - i thought you saidit was fun. - by the end of the night, we were all dancingin the blood, so on the whole,i would still have to say it was a positive experience. hey, you're handsome,and you know it. clap your hands.
- ♪ i may have two left feet ♪ ♪ but i can still feel the beat ♪ ♪ and i keep dancing all night long ♪ - i'll take three. thanks. - ♪ how can i complain when... ♪ - yeah, i'll take that.thank you. - ♪ so i'll be dancing all night long ♪ ♪ yeah, i'll be... ♪
- want to dance? - sure. - ♪ i've got a smile for everyone i see ♪ ♪ for everyone i see ♪ - milady. - ♪ is playing just for me ♪ - you guys look cute together-- ford and his girl,you and jess. i'm glad you all came.
- you--congratulations!ed, you did it! you got married today! you--you're the man, ed. oh, man, ed's gonna have sextonight! - shh. - i don't--he never did itbefore. - you're so loud.- it's gonna happen. i wish i could be there. - [laughs]no, you don't.
- ♪ yeah, i'll be dancing all night ♪ - ♪ take my hand, darling ♪ - oh, my god, hi. you look happy. - we're getting married. - you're--you're--con-- you guys, congratulations! - i love this man so much. - wait.
what about the whole"it's so awesome we're gay "'cause we can sleep around and still bein a relationship" thing? - oh, we're cutting backon that; honestly, it was getting to be a bittoo much work emotionally. and... we're still open to inviting the occasional fellowinto our bed every now and then--you know,for a special occasion--
a birthday, easter... - well, i'm just happy everyone's havingsuch a good time. - excuse us. - hello?is this thing on? - hey, can i haveyour attention, please? i'd like to make a toast to our newlyweds,ed and marta, proof that america deserves
an interracialromeo and juliet. ed, you're not just a bossto me. you're a--you are,but you're a great boss, a great one. but more importantly, when i see you stare at marta, i see true love, something i haven't feltfor a very, very long time until now.
callie... let me tell you guys,it feels awesome. l'chaim. [people cheer] - stop, stop- i got a little thing to say. hello, everybody. [microphone feedback squeals] i also have a toasti'd like to give. i just want to sayi love you, ed.
i love you, marta. but most importantly, i love these two peopleright here, ford and callie. callie, come on.come on up. come on. now, not everyone knows this, but the three of us are actuallydating each other. we are all very muchin love with each other, mutually.
and sexually.[people gasp] and we shouldn't have tohide that, you know? i love you, ford.i love you, callie. we can make this work. - jesus, noah! [people exclaim] - all right, put onthe swing music. everyone likes swing.it's coming back. - dude, what are you doing?
- i'm being you. i'm being fun and honestand dumb. - yeah, and telling ed the one thing we discussednot to tell him? - you're being ridiculous.- stop yelling. - i'm not yelling!you're yelling! - you're both yelling. come on.i'm really disappointed. - look, if you wantto fire him, i'm sorry,
but i'm not a sexual weirdo. that's him.it was his idea. - look, look, look--- that's bullshit! - listen--- i'm sorry, ed. - i wouldn't fire you if you would have told mediscreetly. plus, this whole scene tonight?what? - i know you love godand god is mad at us right now-- - are you firing us?
- look, i like you guys. i want to give youtwo weeks' severance. - you're firing us? - i need to gomake apologies, okay? [jazz music playing] [muttering]a bunch of superfreaks. - i'm not a sexual weirdo,though. - i'm sorry about that. you doing okay?i'm sorry, mama.
- it was fun, right? - hey, what? - come on, guys. it's over.- no. look, you don't haveto break up with us. just--just choose. - i'm not gonna choose. right now,you guys are fighting, but you'll get over it.
i think i should justlet you guys be together. - no.- oh, come on. - we had an awesome timetogether. let's just end it right now,like this. sorry. wait, wait. no, come on, callie. stop.i--it's my fault. i can fix it.[sighs]
shit. - dude, what is wrongwith you? grow up. - you're telling me to grow up?- yeah. i don't careif you read books or know about art. you're more of a childthan i am. - [laughs]you're not even a person. you're like a stupidgolden retriever
that everyone gives a pass tobecause it's a dog and it's an idiot. this thing sucks,by the way. it makes everything tastelike metal. i liked her... in the first timein probably ever. and you ruined that. - you tried to take herfrom me right here,right in front of me.
and you would have done that. i would have. so in what wayare you my friend? [waitress' "young in mind" playing] [mellow pop music] - ♪ everyone is wrong ♪ ♪ and we just won't be bothered ♪ ♪ as they want us to go along ♪ ♪ but we've ♪
♪ got other plans and hopes inside us ♪ ♪ so we'll keep moving on ♪ ♪ 'cause there is no other way ♪ ♪ we just don't belong ♪ ♪ here where all the words and thoughts ♪ ♪ seem to lack color ♪ ♪ we're still young in mind ♪ - hey, so thanksfor coming to meet me. - yeah, of course.
- i feel pretty stupidand embarrassed about the whole wedding thing. - don't worry about it. - i want to show you somethingreal quick. i, uh... did a little artworkin the back-- you know the backgroundof your aging app. - no way.thank you. seriously, it looks awesome.
- really?- yes. - cool. but here's the thing. i'm starting to domore painting, and i need a website, and i am no good at that, and i was wondering if,you know, you could help me outa little bit. - yeah.[laughs]
of course.i would love to help you. - all right.thank you. - and i also have been thinking that maybe you should justask ed for your job back. i mean, he's a total softy. he'll probably give it to you. and we all justreally miss you. - maybe. i--[sighs] i think i might just, like,try setting out on my own
and doing my own thing,'cause, you know, screw bills, right? like, who needs waterand power? - yes, electricityis very overrated. - [chuckles] i do miss you too. - send me a picture.come on. "i like the new hairdo, marta. now what are you wearing?"
[chuckles] "well, i'm wearing a suit now, "but i might not be later. "oh, my goodness, those? "those are my favorite, baby. i love those socks.ooh." [knocking] oh.uh... oh, come in.come in.
hi, ford. - ed. look... i wronged you, and i'm sorry. i'll do anythingto get my job back. i'll do weekends. and overtime. okay, i'll babysitfor you and marta.
- we don't have a kid.- yet. but the way you guyslook at each other? it's only a matter of time. all right, here's the deal. getting fired, it made me realizethat i care about this job, probably more than i waswilling to admit. and when i put my mind to it,i'm good at what i do. i may not be a creative genius,
but i know how to getpeople's attention. plus, i'm one of the onlytwo guys in the world who has been practicingthis pitch for weeks. - what about noah? - he doesn't talk to me anymore. - okay, so thenif someone clicks here, then they can geta link to your paintings. - okay, i got it. - we're not done.
- do you want to see some ofthe stuff i've been working on? - so this ismy bad banksy rip-off that i made back wheni was young and impressionable. so, you know,like two months ago or so. - i mean, it's awesome. everything's awesome. and i'm not just saying that. and i'm not just sayingthat i'm not just saying that. everything i'm saying is--
- so what are you saying? - you're great--painter. you're a great painter.- thank you. - it all looks--it--yeah. oh, no.- oh, yeah. [both laugh] i must say, i still thinktight is your masterpiece. [soft music] - welcome to buzzed.
we're thrilledto have you here today. we're really excitedabout this campaign. you're gonna flip. so sit back, get comfortable, and ford hereis gonna take the lead. - [exhales]thanks, ed. so you guys know the basic idea: a sprawling, city-widescavenger hunt called the converse course.
but then we thought, "what is the basic essenceof this product?" shoes are boring. sneakers are iconic. converse is the newrebel american icon, but it's also more than that. it bonds togetherthis generation with their sports, hip-hop,and punk rock forefathers. youthful idealism and fun.
it's a brandgrounded in friendship. it's a sneaker of your everyday. those multiple meanings... are what jumped-started meand my partner when we came up with this. you guys are staring at melike... okay, um... i'll--i'll be right back. - we had enchiladasfor lunch yesterday, so...
- so scavenger hunts. as you may not know, scavenger hunts were inventedby... canada. - what's going on? - ed, i don't know. i don't know what got into me.i'm sorry. - dude, is everything okay? 'cause you are blowing itout there, okay?
this is serious, ford. - look, i'll be fine. just go in thereand buy me some time, please. - [sighs]fine. just a couple minutes, okay? but in those couple minutes, whatever you need to do,do it. all right, man,i'm counting on you. - so what i was trying to say is,
converse is morethan just a name. what i was gonna say isa lot of stuff about i--icon-- - [whispers]iconography. - iconography. but to be honest,i don't know what "iconography" means. - and that's why i'm here to handle all that nonsense. great to meet all of you.
noah anders,ladies and gentlemen. sorry i'm late. i was just working on a littlelast-minute concept art. uh, i think ford here has given youa good introduction to our theme. now, the central premiseis this. the converse courseis to be conquered not by an individualbut by a team of two.
each partner will simultaneouslytake a different but parallel paththrough the city, following the clues and communicating witheach other along the way. and only be combiningthose clues and working togethercan they find the treasure. it's a journey that requiressteady communication and trust and perseverance. the only way to findthe pair of golden converse
is to first bea pair of friends. [gentle music] - heavens to betsy,that was incredible. - oh, thank you, ed. - i can't deicidewhich is more glorious: your nuts or your noggin. - oh.- so are you back for good? - uh, no, this was justa one-time thing. thank you for calling me.
- probably want to thank you. i want to say i'm sorry about how i actedat the wedding and what i said. you're nota golden retriever. you're a person. i want to say sorry too, for trying to steal callie. that was probably
the shittiest thingi've ever done. - look, we got to find a wayto get past this, okay? so i have an idea, which this is gonna sounda little crazy, but--but just go with meon this one. i think we should puncheach other in the face as many times as possible. we just keep goinguntil someone gives up-- - are you for real?
- right here?- yeah, definitely. yeah.- okay. whew.[laughs] you sure?- yeah, let's go. - like, you know,just like a boom. - yeah.- okay. i--okay. don't want to break those. - yeah, okay.
um, good.on three? - on three. - so ready?- yeah. - good?- mm-hmm. - okay, um... yeah, okay. one, two, three. okay, look, see,we closed our eyes. false start.- yeah.
- all right,so we'll do it again. eyes open.- eyes open. - on three.- in the face. - yup.and one, two-- ooh!- shit! - ah!- you hit me! - ah, that hurts. - i don't knowhow boxers do this! you should have her.
- yeah, i don't thinki ever really loved her. i think i just--i loved the idea of her. if she's your one,you should go for it. i don't thinkshe was my one. i mean, i want to besomebody's priority. you know? i want someone who'sgonna listen and care, someone who's gonna be100% completely into me. and only me.
no offense. - no, none taken. - she's probablywith emery now. - yeah, you think?- yeah. that guy looked good.- yeah, he did. but we're done withthe punching, right? - yeah.- cool. [christian carcamo's "closer to you" playing] [light instrumental music]
"dear jess, "i've made an incredible number of mistakes "over the past few months. "but since they've all led up "to me getting to know you better, "i wouldn't take back a single one of them. "i don't know what you're doing today, "but if you're not busy, "there are some things around the city
that might be cool to check out." - ♪ it's how we fall ♪ ♪ what if we lose? ♪ ♪ will we get to choose? ♪ - "this is where you showed me "that you knew me better than i knew myself "and you gave me some good advice that i should have taken a lot earlier." - ♪ what if we run? ♪
♪ i want to feel closer ♪ - "this is where you showed me that you were a loyal friend even when i didn't have the courage to be me." - ♪ i want to feel closer ♪ ♪ closer to you ♪ ♪ oh, whoa-oh-oh-oh ♪ ♪ oh, whoa-oh-oh ♪ - "this is where we danced for the first time." - ♪ wish that i had stayed ♪
- hi.- hi. - it was strawberry, right? for the dream date? - took you long enough. ♪ i want to be closer ♪ - whew. - congratulations. i think a part of me misses designing with you guysfor the masses,
but it's a very small part. - very small.- yeah. this is cooler.- yeah. - matthias.- i know this guy. - matthias, thank you so muchfor this whole party. this is so cool. - it was an honor. your art is so stimulating. [imitates horse neighing]down, boy.
seeing you and jess togethertonight gives me--how do you say--extreme waves of pleasure. - maybe don't say itlike that. - oh, have you met alexandra, the nubian princessrunning the coat check? - no.- i have. and she has shared with mea little secret. she has been lucid-dreamingsince the age of 17. [clicks tongue]
tonight we are goingto paint the walls with all sorts of fluids. maybe i will havethe art show. - hey, guys.- hey. - i'd like you to meet sophie,my girlfriend... - hi.- whose mother, by the way, is annie leibovitz's camera assistant. - yeah, annie leibovitz.
that's definitelya person ford knows. - well, you know,i used to be a fan of her early portrait era, but now it'sher post-bankruptcy era that absolutely has memind-blown. - wha-a-at? look at you. - yeah, maybe sometimewe can all get together and go to dinnerwith my mom and her.
- yeah, that'd be great. - see?isn't she just perfect? - look at you, man. everybody hereadmiring your work. i'm proud of you. - thanks, man. - hey, i hope it's okaythat i came. - yeah, i--i thinkit's great. - i've been wanting to talkto you guys about something.
- you want us back.- both of us? - we have girlfriends now.- sorry, little late. - it was fun.- it was fine. - uh, no, what i wantedto tell you was i loved us. i really did careabout you guys. and i loved both of you. but i love you moreas friends, and that wasn't gonna happenif i was in the picture.
- yeah.- yeah. - i mean, we did makea good couple, us three, right? - yeah, no, we were--a throuple, really. - an adorable throuple.- yeah. hey, you know, here.take our photo. i'll make the whole storyeasier to explain when you're telling people. - yeah, all right.
- here's the deal. in the dating game, there are so many things that can go wrong. we might not be done making mistakes, but it finally feels like we're getting it right. - ♪ oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ ♪ oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ ♪ oh, oh... ♪ - should we go backin coat check
and make out for a minute? - yeah, probably. - ♪ oh, oh, oh ♪ ♪ oh, oh, oh ♪ - well... my period of celibacyis over. [laughter] human intercourseis a truly magnificent act. - it's all yours.
- i don't know whyi just shook his hand. - maybe we should justgo back to my place. - ♪ oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ ♪ oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ ♪ i feel just like i've be reborn ♪ ♪ can you feel it too? ♪ ♪ i know that we have survived the storm ♪ ♪ so what can't we do? ♪ ♪ oh, i believein a different perfection now ♪
♪ no white picket fence ♪ ♪ simply saying that i'm never coming down ♪ ♪ we never touch the ground ♪ ♪ whoa, oh, oh ♪
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